What About Childcare for Small Groups?

Question: What do you do about childcare for small groups?

When it comes to small groups, you should stay out of the childcare business, no matter how much pressure you get to take on the responsibility. Believe me when I tell you that, if you don’t make this decision on the front end, childcare will become a growth barrier and logistical nightmare as your number of small groups grow.

The best solution is to empower each small group to be responsible for its own childcare needs. If you struggle with this issue, here are some creative and workable options:

1 – Have everyone in the group who has children pitch in financially to hire a baby sitter or two every week. When all of the parents give a little the cost is surprisingly minimal.

2 – Set up a rotation where a different couple in the group baby sits the children each week. Make sure no one has to baby sit more that once or twice during the semester.

3 – Challenge every couple with children to find a solution before coming to group (baby sitter, relative, etc.). After all, they have to find childcare when they go out on a date or have a work function. Most parents have several childcare options.

4 – Create a child-friendly group where parents are encouraged to bring their children. This works best with moms’ groups who meet during the day and plan their group around activities for the children.

These are just a few of the many options available to you. The big point is: Don’t get roped into providing the childcare solutions for your groups or for the group you HOST. Let the group attenders come up with creative solutions themselves, with some helpful input from you.

Take a few minutes to brainstorm other potential childcare options. What have you seen work? What would you like to try? Get some other people involved in this conversation and see where it leads.

Doing Small Groups in Semesters

Question: I like the idea of semester-based small groups that meet for 10-12 weeks and then end. But doesn’t that keep deep and meaningful relationships from forming? Doesn’t the group end just as people are really getting to know each other?

This is one of the most common questions about the semester-based small group system. But it is based on fundamentally flawed information. Here’s the deal:

Most church leaders assume that, if involved in a “standard” 18-24 month small group system, 10-12 people will sign up, love being together and become intimate friends. But that’s not what really happens…

In reality, some people will click and others won’t. If the group extends beyond 12 weeks, those who haven’t really clicked start looking for ways to get out. Their attendance gets spotty. And even those who do form strong friendships begin to get bored before that year and a half to two years is up.

The goal of the semester-based group is not to encourage intimate relationships, but to create a safe, healthy environment through which basic friendships can form. Those meaningful relationships that start during the semester will continue to grow naturally outside the group after it ends.  At The Orchard Church, Small Groups are "Relate" in our "Reach, Relate, Reproduce" process.  For us, Small Groups are not "grow", "disciple", etc...

We would all be much better off if we stopped promising (and then trying to force) intimate relationships within our small groups. It’s a promise we can’t deliver on. What we can and should deliver is a safe, healthy social environment where people can meet other like-minded people so that relationships can develop naturally.

This truth takes a lot of pressure off of small group leaders. Too often, leaders feel like failures when the people in their groups don’t become great friends.

One side note – if you are like us, you are constantly trying to get unchurched men to sign up for small groups. Realize that these guys aren’t consciously looking for “intimate” relationships, but they would like to have a place where they can meet some other cool people, learn something new and explore what it means to know God more deeply. If you stop talking about the amazing, intimate relationships that will form in small groups, you just might stop scaring them off!